Sedge Court Journal
Providing sports fans with expert analysis since 2004

Monday, August 22, 2005

This post goes out to all of you leg-humping dogs and raging hermaphrodites who doubted the Kleinerbreiner would set aside time in his busy schedule to write about himself in the third person on blogs and deliver picks that should allow you to break even on your bets this year (if you don't count the juice on your losses).

Todays lesson: "the west" is apparently a far distant land somewhere beyond Schaumburg, IL.

Fancy that, you say, Klinerbreiner finally emerges to post a pick when a team from the Pac-NW is playing a game on prime-time. While I am a Seattle apologist with a very subjective and inflated perception of how totally rad the Emerald City is, I would like to opine in defense of those few Seattle expats who call the Midwest home: we get screwed on biased football tv coverage. Let me site an example:

Last year, the over-hyped 3 and 1 Hawks went up against the 4 and 0 Pats on the Sunday following Columbus day. Televised nationally on Fox, n'est ce pas? That's what the ads said and that's what I expected as I sat down to watch the game. However, to my disgust, the local Fox affiliate thought it more appropriate to broadcast a rerun of the Columbus Day Parade from the week prior.

Now, I understand that the Bears are THE only town worth talking about in Chicago. However, where I come from, football is football and I would rather watch a match up of French Guyanian Special-Olympic football teams than watch a rerun of Chicagoland's finest Degos. I won't even go into the fact that we get to watch Western Michigan games rather than two top 10 PAC-10 teams match-up. my first pick of the 2005 season, I bet ESPN to re-broadcast the Kankakee, IL vs Boise, ID Little League World Series regional qualifying Pool C game rather than show the Dallas/Seattle game. Trust me folks, this is instant money in the bank.

Regarding the outcome of the actual game, I pick Seattle to cover the spread comfortably. Dallas looked rough in its LOSS to Arizona last week. Arizona! I don't even think the Cardinals are allowed to win this year. On the contrary, Seattle was strong against New Orleans, beating them soundly with a balanced offensive showing.

Drew Bledsoe could get the start for Dallas. Bledsoe, a WSU product and a native of Walla Walla, WA, will underperform for two reasons: he is old and the Seahawk defensive secondary is the only not-sucky component of the 26th ranked Seattle D. Trufaunt (another Washinton native and WSU grad) will leave a rusty Bledsoe with few options. Onions and Reislings are the only thing "sweet" from Walla-Walla these days.

Seattle's front office failed to get their boys any solid receivers (ones with basic motor skills) in the offseason and Hasselback is good but not great. With this said, I don't expect the Seahawks to put up points like they did last week. The under is appealing in this one.

Seattle wins. If you are palying the parlay, take the under.

Piss and shit and fuck and damnit,


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